Assalaamu alaikum everyone. Today's Deen Talk! is on Sexual Harassment, an issue which affects women in nearly every part of society, but which affects Muslim women in a more unique way. In shaa Allah this will be the first of a three-party series on Women and Islam.
So, unfortunately, sexual harassment is pretty pervasive in society. Let me start off by saying that sexual harassment, assault, and rape have NOTHING to do with sex and sexuality but, rather, have everything to do with power. The perpetrator is doing this to gain a sense of power over the victim. If it had anything to do with sex, little kids wouldn't get harassed and raped. (Blunt - sorry.)
So when we look at a girl who gets harassed, we should not be blaming her. There is absolutely no basis for this. Especially in the Muslim Ummah, this is even more ridiculous, as we are telling girls in hijab and even girls in jilbab and niqab "you were asking for it, because of how you dress/you aren't modest enough/you post pictures online/your eyes and hands are uncovered/etc.."
The fact that I've had to say the above in justification for wearing niqab is ridiculous enough. But it's even more ridiculous that online I'm sexually harassed by my Muslim brothers. Every. Day. And then I have sisters blaming me, for having old pictures without niqab up, for posting pictures in general, etc.
[Prophet], tell believing men to lower their glances and guard their private parts: that is purer for them. God is well aware of everything they do.
Surah an-Nur, 24:30
Guys, this is exactly what rape culture is. We should not be excusing the actions of men and blaming them on women. It's ridiculous that I should be held accountable for someone else's behaviour, especially when they were first commanded by Allah 'azza w jal to lower their gaze. This is even more illustrated in the following Hadith:
We need to be working together against this. This is EXACTLY why I am a feminist, which I started to say in the video but at 15 minutes realized the video was getting quite long. We need to stop claiming men are completely out of control of their behavior - this just isn't true, and Allah al-Alim showed us this by telling men FIRST to lower their gaze, before giving the women any command on hijab. And we need to stop blaming women for men who aren't controlling their own behavior and claiming they aren't modest for some reason or another - hijab is for Allah ta'ala. Yes, He gave it to us for our protection, to keep men from assuming we were prostitutes so they would, in shaa Allah, leave us alone. But by putting focus on the "fitna" women create by not "properly" following hijab (more on this next Friday!), and NOT putting ANY focus on men and the fitna they create by failing to properly follow hijab (both for us and for themselves), we are buying into the idea that rape is about sex and it's ultimately the fault of the woman or victim.
And that's why people are now sexualizing children, because now even 11 year-old-girls are being seen as "asking for it."
Assalaamu alaikum everyone! Today is Wednesday, and Wednesdays are for PRODUCT REVIEWS! And I'm FAR too excited about today's review! (Seriously! You don't even know! - Additionally, my apologies for it being put up around Maghreb time... I had an MRI today when I would have normally been writing up my blog.)
Starting out, ordering from Joanna was a dream. She is so so sweet and very quick to respond. If you ever have any questions about an order (how heavy/warm fabric is, which color you should order, length of niqab, etc.), she responds promptly and will give her honest opinion, ma shaa Allah! If you are concerned about your package, she does her best to help, and if you want to order a fabric that she is nearly out of, she will let you know. Allahumma barik laha!
Shipping took about three weeks from when she mailed the package. My package left Morocco on August 18 and I received it after Maghreb on September 5. The shipping site for Poste Moroc can be a little confusing, especially after the package arrives in the U.S.. My package appeared to "arrive" at its destination about four times before it was actually delivered to me; I think it's a misunderstanding on the translation or system when it comes to how USPS works.
When I opened my package (after a bad day and thinking it would, yet again, not arrive after appearing on the website that it would), the first thing I noticed was the smell of Arabic coffee! I don't know why, but my jilbab I ordered smelled like Arabic coffee made with cardamom! The niqab, unfortunately, did not have this scent, but the scent really perked me up! Some initial thoughts while putting on the jilbab:
"It's so wide!"
"Oh wow it's the perfect length!"
"The color isn't as bright as I expected..."
"Oh cool, I can use it as a niqab without tying it above my bun!"
See? No pins!
Note: Adding jacket does bring jilbab up some.
I think that, perhaps, the headband and ties are wider than other jilabib I've owned. This may be what allows the bottom part to get pulled up for use as niqab easily. However, you can order your jilbab with "niqab strings" when you order from Tasnim; these come standard with the khimar-niqabs.
The Hafsah jilbab comes with thumb loops. I didn't think I would like these, I will admit. I don't tend to care if some of my forearm is exposed, even while wearing gloves, and prefer that to a lack of freedom of motion. As an artist, my sleeves getting pushed up is pretty normal. However, I actually like to use the thumb loops on this jilbab, especially during salah. I prefer them on my thumbs rather than my middle finger, as I feel more restricted with the latter. If I am wearing a jacket or cardigan I generally don't wear the loops, however, as that does either restrict movement quite a bit (for me) or it ends up bringing up the skirt of the jilbab further than I generally prefer.
The jilbab itself is lightweight and breathable, but not as breathable/cool as nidha fabric. However, this is probably the next best fabric I've worn, other than cotton. I had the jilbab cut "petite" due to my small size, and while it seems wide due to the cut, I know that, had I requested "regular," it would have been near to ridiculous and comical on me. As it is, I really love this cut - it's like a wide caftan or "Saudi" jilbab cut - and the flowiness helps keep you cool in the heat. I mentioned that the color isn't as bright as anticipated - on the computer and on the video the fabric appears much more vibrant than it does in real life and in the pictures posted here. However, the color is still beautiful and it REALLY brings out my olive undertones, to the point that I did double-takes several times the first day I wore it!
The niqab is absolutely gorgeous. When I put it on and realized it had an eye veil, which isn't noted or shown online, I was extremely excited, as none of my other niqabs have this. I don't really like to wear sunglasses with niqab because I feel it can look kind of weird and I know that a lack of seeing the face and eyes tends to... disturb people more than just niqab. However, with my light sensitivity, this isn't feasible (I even have to wear sunglasses at night if we are driving or if we are going on a walk, my sensitivity is this bad... and I'm on medication that makes it manageable). I've found that having the eye screen down (it can be flipped up if desired), while still needing sunglasses at times normal people also need sunglasses, allows me to be outside without them during normal lighting and at night. This has been a HUGE breakthrough for me as I feel it helps me interact more normally with others.
Without eye screen.
With eye screen down.
The niqab has a ribbon at the nose. I was dubious about this at first, as I worried the wider ribbon (as compared to the string on my string niqab) would fit weird with my face due to how small I am. However, I really like it, and the length of it is just perfect (I had to alter the length of the string, which has now caused fraying) and I think it fits really well with my more goth-y style.
This niqab is super unique! I thought it was just a Saudi-style niqab, but instead the "two" veil layers are actually connected!
As you can see, when you flip the first veil layer over your face, it becomes a wide circle of fabric, with no hem. Each side also has ties, so you can bring forward the veil layers to cover your arms and chest without flipping it forward. Another suggestion (unshown), was to tie the niqab ties to the wrists to keep full coverage behind you while walking.
The niqab, as named, is quite long! It is so long, in fact, that I was concerned it would touch the ground due to my short stature. Luckily, it doesn't, but if you are shorter than 4'10", it's quite possible that it will. You should be able to speak with Joanna via email and it may be possible for them to shorten the length if desired.
Here you can see how long the niqab is on me, and how wide the jilbab is, even at "petite".
The niqab portion itself is close to the longest I like on me, as much longer can make eating difficult. The fabric used by Tasnim Collections for this niqab is very similar to the fabric used by Sunnah Style, if you have used their niqabs before. It's not as breathable as Saudi Crepe, but it is likely the next-most breathable fabric on the market.
Overall, I'm extremely happy with this order, and I would love to try other items from Tasnim, bi'ithnillah, as they have some really beautiful and innovative designs which I haven't found elsewhere! If you want to order the Hafsah jilbab, go here, and if you would like to order the XXL Niqab (which also comes in several color choices!), go here.
In shaa Allah you enjoyed my review as much as I enjoy these products! Please let me know if there is something specific you would like to see reviewed!
Jazakum Allahu kheiran,
Sajida.
Because doesn't everyone put on their new clothes at 8pm and watch Smallville?
Assalaamu alaikum, dear readers! Today's review is on HijabiCity's jersey hijabs and the satin criss-cross ninja underscarf, both pictured above, as well as featured in the tutorial of the above look, on my YouTube channel!
So to start out, let's take a look at the hijabs. Jana sent me two jersey hijabs, one in grey (above) and the other in a dark teal.
Here is the co-wife testing out the teal one for me!
The hijabs are extremely light weight and breathable. My co-, Eliza, has trouble with overheating very easily, so I have her test things in heat so I can give extreme examples. She said that the hijab itself was very light, so light she couldn't feel that it was on, and specified that when she did overheat (and remove the scarf) when we were out, it mostly was not due to any additional heat from the hijab, as it didn't really add any heat at all due to its breathability.
The scarves are about normal pashmina length but are a bit wider, which I really like, because it helps to ensure you don't lose coverage of your neck in the back even if you have a lot of hair (and thus a large bun, like me) or if you like to make folded layers on your hijabs.
I'd say it's about 1.5x - 2x the width of a normal scarf.
The downside we found is that, due to the composition of the hijabs, there is quite a bit of static cling. I've seen this in other light weight scarves, and I'm not entirely sure what causes it. To prevent the static and prevent hair weaving into the hijab, I recommend trying to air dry them instead of sticking them in the dryer. In shaa Allah that solves the problem.
As for the satin underscarf, I was SUPER excited to receive this! On Instagram there is a sister who has what appears to be a leather criss-cross underscarf, and this satin one is the closest I've found, looks-wise.
I've purchased two other underscarves from HijabiCity, back when they were American Abaya Co. I don't know that there is any standardization on the underscarf sizes, by any means - the magenta one was a bit large on me, and the black one I bought fits perfectly - this likely is from there manufacturer. The satin underscarf actually was almost a little small, which was bizarre to me since I'm child-sized! I think it's because, like I said above, I end up having a large bun, so it's pulling the underscarf back, exposing more of my forehead than I generally like.
Here you can see the bun and that the underscarf is pulling back.
What I've found is that it is possible to use the ninja underscarf as a tube underscarf by putting your entire head through the front opening and then pulling it back. Not only does this solve the issue of my underscarf pulling back, it also makes it possible to use these underscarves outside of fall/winter, eliminating the need for duplicate underscarves! Why I didn't think of this sooner, I have no clue. But I'm glad I finally realized it with this one, as I absolutely LOVE the underscarf itself!
Here you can see it used as a tube underscarf. More forehead is covered, alhamdulillah.
Overall, I am pretty happy with these products! One or two minor downsides were all that were found, while the rest was fantastic! I highly suggest HijabiCity for cute and affordable ninja underscarves, and I'm happy we found another scarf my co-wife can use without overheating for when she covers or wears hijab (because believe me, this is a feat!).
To check out the products I received, as well as the other products HijabiCity has to offer, check out their website here. They have many different styles, including instant hijabs.
Thank you all so much for reading! Please let me know if there is anything you would like reviewed or any tutorials you would like to see, in shaa Allah!
Jazakum Allahu kheiran,
Sajida.
Because who doesn't wear a crazy Halloween headband with their niqab?!
Today's review is on the gorgeous Manal chain niqab I ordered from Boutique al-Badwi! They are an Etsy store and they also have an Instagram (handle under above picture). Currently their Etsy store is closed while they recover from Hurricane Irma.
I actually ordered this niqab about a month or so ago but I wanted to wait to review it until after Eid so I could provide them (and you!) with good pictures of the product.
As stated in the video, this niqab wasn't my first choice. It was actually my second choice and it became my first after the sister running the company informed me my first choice had been discontinued. Here are pictures of them so you can see their similarities and differences (pictures from the @al__badwi IG page):
Noora - rounded niqab with dangling chains.
Manal - same design as Noora but triangular with no chains.
As you can see, the two pieces are incredibly similar, so when I was informed the Noora had been discontinued, I wasn't too heartbroken about ordering the Manal in silver.
Shipping was INCREDIBLY prompt! I ordered it and about 20 minutes later received an update that my order had shipped. Apparently I caught the owner with my order just prior to her taking the shipments to the mail. Subhan'Allah! It was obviously meant to be!
I received my order very quickly (it shipped on the 11th and I received on the 15th!) and immediately tried it on. The main critique I have is that the chain attachments for the niqab portion of the veil are extremely long. Probably over twice as long as necessary! Luckily I'm handy, so I just shortened the chains with jewelry pliers and was good-to-go! Then it just took me a few days to figure out how to tie the niqab and have it stay in place.
My first test of the chain niqab, trying to have it tied within my jilbab. It kept slipping.
Wore it to Ross because, why not? At least I figured out how to tie it properly...
After the third time or so, I figured out how to tie it and keep it in place well. I then adjusted the clasp so the chain portion was snug. Below is the picture tutorial for how to put on this style of chain niqab:
Tie ribbon above bun.
Take chain and secure above bun.
Untie ribbon and re-secure below bun.
Chain niqab can be worn with or without a cloth niqab underneath. For testing purposes and for Eid I did not wear a niqab under it. I have been receiving some criticism due to this, but I do not follow strict niqab (for more information on why I wear niqab, please read this post.) So I feel perfectly comfortable with using just the chain niqab as it still obscures the face.
I noted part of why I wore the niqab around without cloth niqab was for testing purposes - the seller and I were unsure if the materials used were nickel free, or at least nickel free enough for those with allergies. The silver is made from zinc alloy. I have a pretty severe nickel allergy (by way of nickel allergies, at least) - I will break out into hives/rash wherever it touches my skin, and this happens very quickly. Alhamdulillah I did not get hives from wearing this chain niqab at all, so it should be safe for those with nickel allergies. The gold is gold plated.
This piece is absolutely gorgeous and in shaa Allah I will be ordering (in the future!) one of the more expensive (but even more ornate and beautiful) pieces from Boutique al-Badwi! For their Etsy, please go here. I'm unsure when they will reopen, but keep an eye on their Instagram (that's @al__badwi with TWO underscores!) to find out.
Unfortunately my Eid al-Adha was really rough but alhamdulillah I really absolutely loved my outfits, in large part due to this gorgeous piece, and that helped at least a little bit!
My outfits for if I had gone to Eid prayer and my friend's wedding.
*sigh*
Jazakum Allahu kheiran everyone! See you next Wednesday for another review!
Seen this type of photo? This is what the review is for!
Assalaamu alaikum!
Today's review will be GROSS! The above photo is the worst, unless actively peeling skin grosses you out even more. In which case... Watch the video but don't pass GO, do not take $200, turn around and DON'T LOOK BACK because this is like one of those videos on YouTube my Husband makes me stop watching because it's so disgusting it's like a train wreck and you can't look away. You have been warned!
Ok. So, on Amazon Prime Day, I bought one of these foot peeling masks that I had been seeing ALL over Facebook. Now, feet gross me out, and having been in the military, I have now tons of callous. So I've done everything from the Ped-Egg, to foot scrubs, to pumice stone, to microbrasion gels and chemical peels, to soaking my feet in Listerine! NOTHING got me the smooth, soft, non-itchy skin that I wanted on my feet. So when I saw the super gross pictures like the one above, I was like, ok, I'll give this one a shot.
Basically what you do is you put these plastic socks on your feet, tape them so they fit/shut, cover them with normal socks, massage your feet periodically while you wait an hour, and rinse your feet off.
After a few days, the parts of my feet which had NOT been covered by the socks appeared sun burnt. I don't know why, but they did. After another day or so, the skin at the bottom of my feet started to feel like plastic. After a week or two your feet should start to peel. It'll look like a blister coming up.
You will also find parts that start to peel like a bad sunburn.
This process will continue for two weeks.
Here. Have gross pictures of my feet.
All-in-all, I had to use both pairs of socks. I had some difficulties with some of the skin peeling off, so the second pair was used to continue the process. Now? My callouses are actually largely gone! I would definitely use this again. My feet are less itchy, which is an issue I was having due to all of the dead, dry skin I had. I mean, yea, there could be more improvement, but I'm really happy with the results of this; I just wish I hadn't needed to use both pairs to achieve my results. If I use these again, I'll try to refrain from picking and pulling at my skin to see if achieving the results in the very first photo is a) possible and b) helps the process at all.
If you would like to purchase the exact item I did, you can do so here. Don't forget to select a charity to donate to while using Amazon Smile!
However, you TOTALLY can get these for a cheaper price (I'm talking $1-$3) on Wish, but you will have to wait at least a month to receive your items. If you're happy with that, go ahead! If that's not fast enough, definitely please use the link above and donate to a charity of your choice in the process.
